D is for… Directing Traffic

On a recent trip to India*, I observed a strange phenomenon that has a parallel with pointless Project Managers. I saw a great number of people, mainly in uniforms, whose sole function seemed to be to wave people in the direction they were going anyway. This was particularly prevalent in the airport, but was also… Continue reading D is for… Directing Traffic

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P is for… People (part 1)

Now we’re getting to the meat. Cobb’s Paradox: “We know why projects fail, we know how to prevent their failure-so why do they still fail?” Martin Cobb Treasury Board of Canada Secretariat Since 1994 the Standish Group have been producing their Chaos Report. This project “ exposes the overwhelming failure of IT application development projects… Continue reading P is for… People (part 1)

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N is for… Nicknames

Nicknames aren’t anything new. Some people get them, some don’t. Some last for a while and die away, some stick for life. They can be derogatory, complimentary, used to the person’s face or just behind their back, but very, very rarely, are they planned. Here’s the deal, everyone should have a nickname that is known… Continue reading N is for… Nicknames

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B is for… Butterfly

The basic rules of prioritisation tell you what is important, what you should do next, what is really important to concentrate on. The butterfly doesn’t follow these rules. They flit from flower to flower on a whim. Quite like the flip-flop, this change of direction can often be as a result of a conversation but… Continue reading B is for… Butterfly

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F is for… Flip-Flop

Those of you of an older vintage may remember the flip-flop. A simple logic circuit that can be in one state or another. You get people like that too. Having no clue about anything, they tend not to have any definitive opinion of their own. Instead, they carry about with them the opinion of the… Continue reading F is for… Flip-Flop

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O is for… Ostrich

You know the type, you probably have some of them in your organisation; when there’s a problem, they bury their head in the sand, usually because it is beyond their capabilities to do anything else. They will ignore the inevitability of the situation, hoping upon hope that it will go away. Usually until the very… Continue reading O is for… Ostrich

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D is for… Dambuster

You will invariably find, as you go about your trade, many people who will try to put obstacles in your way. You know the sort, those workshy fops that will try to hide behind process, officialdom and “You’ll need to raise a request before I can look at that” or “I can’t do anything about… Continue reading D is for… Dambuster

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C is for… Competency Mask

Sometimes all is not what it seems. And this is where your powers of observation have to be at their sharpest. Some arses have a competency mask. It can take many forms but what it can do is give the impression to the untrained eye that they might be “OK” or “capable”. Surely you’re jesting…Here… Continue reading C is for… Competency Mask

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T is for… Timesheet Collector

They call themselves Project Managers but all they really do is collect timesheets and other such frippery. You need to spot these people quickly and ignore everything they say with regard to delivery as the very fact that they call themselves Project Manager signifies that they are an arse and therefore will not obey the… Continue reading T is for… Timesheet Collector

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